Less than five years ago James Holmes walked into a midnight showing of The Dark Knight Rises in Aurora, Colorado. He began to shoot up that theater killing 12 people and injuring another 58 people. Something very horrific that was all over the news at the time, and it was less than five years ago.
Pierce O’Farrill was one of the 58 victims that survived, but unlike most of the victims, and unlike probably most of us, Pierce has forgiven James Holmes. He’s watched him on TV and the trial that he’s going through and he looks at him with nothing but sorrow for the gentleman. He has no idea what troubles been going on or had been going on that night in that gentleman’s head. All he wants to do is forgive him.
What Pierce knows, that most of us seem to forget, is that forgiveness is one of the biggest gifts that you can give yourself. When you forgive somebody else for something they’ve done it doesn’t mean that you’re condoning what they’ve done. It means that you are forgiving them and you’re releasing that from your heart. You’re releasing it from your soul. You’re allowing yourself to move on to something better in your life and leave it behind you. Forgiveness is for you.
There’s an old Buddhist saying that says, “Being angry is like holding a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at somebody.” I love that quote. What it means to me is that to be angry at somebody and hold onto that anger harms you more than anything you could ever do to that person that you’re angry at. Decide to let go of the coal. Decide to let go of your anger. And, decide to forgive the people that have done wrong to you in your life.
By doing this you will find a whole other level of happiness. You will find another way of moving into the world and you will be more joyful in your life. One of these days I will explain to you a concept, a tool that you can use called effective blaming. Effective blaming’s an amazing tool, and I’ll save that for another time.